7. You Cannot Love What You Fear

You cannot love what you fear, especially when that fear is caused by shame for past actions.  It’s much more natural to hate what (and whom) you fear. “They” lower your self-esteem and detract from your sense of triumphant superiority.  Fear and hate are reciprocal, although the fear precedes hate. Violence releases the tension of fear, producing either hate or justification, depending on whether the violence is perpetrated on you or by you.  If on you, hate justifies the fear and calls for further violence. If by you, superiority is asserted and subsequent violence, promising additional release and feelings of superiority can perpetuate the well-being that violence releases.